Online dating has become an easy way to find a male/female partner either for a short or long-term relationship. There are many online dating platforms they men to use and meet new friends.
In a recent poll of my male clients as a dating coach, these items came up as the biggest red flags/complaints. But hang on guys, you are not of the hook-up next article is about complaints women have about men with online dating.
This poll focused on all aspects of online dating from the initial encounter online to going on up to 5 in-real-life dates. The men ages 35-65 polled, 742 total men. All are using online dating. So, here we go!
1. Misrepresenting Physical Attributes
When polled, men said this ranged from lying about age, and physical shape to not looking remotely like the photos posted online. Interestingly enough, 68% of the men said that had the women told their accurate age, weight and current photos, they would have still gone on dates with them. 59% declined a second date primarily due to misstatements.
2. First dates Questions delving into the Ex
This was an overwhelming response. Men polled said this has occurred on at least 80% of their first dates. Now, this does not mean the lighter question “Are you divorced” or “How old are your kids”? Most did not care about this question as 87% of men said their children were very important in their lives. But what was surprising and offensive was this question. “Why did you get divorced”?
Why?
a. If you read their online dating profile, the great majority already say they are divorced.
b. Men commented that a first date is just a “do I like her personality and looks” versus let’s delve into the past.
c. Once the “Why are you divorced” question surfaced on the first date, 91% of men said it led to a rather negative discussion, generally led by the woman into her past marriage. Talk about a turn-off!
3. The men paid on the first dates according to 81% polled
Now, there is no complaint here by the men I asked. However, they did mention the follow-up text should come from the women within 24 hours expressing gratitude whether or not they would like to go on a second date. I think it’s called manners!
4. Receiving hearts/likes/winks/smiles online with no message as a first overture online
Over 75% of men wonder why the woman couldn’t take 3 minutes and send off a message too versus just tossing the ball in the man’s court.
5. Always coming up with the First and Second Date Ideas
Over 60% of men love when women make the suggestion for the first date whether it’s a glass of wine at a specific place or lunch at a favorite restaurant. Also, men commented on this phrase women tend to throw out: “Would like to grab coffee or lunch sometime”. Vague, perhaps not confident or that interested. Instead, over 70% of men appreciated specifics such as “How is Wednesday or Thursday around 6:30 for a margarita at Xavier’s?”
Why? The men commented that the woman is truly interested, and gave a date, and a favorite place. It’s appreciated!
Okay, friends, as I mentioned, women are up to bat next! Stay tuned.
Life, Love, and Laughter!
Andrea McGinty
Dating coach & Dating Counselor
